like it or not... the present shapes the future.
--

an image flashes before my eyes sometimes.

reoccurring
unwavering
animosity.

it's another memory that has never happened.

untrue, fiction, false, undeniable.

i was smoking a cigarette, staring at you with hardened eyes.
you were staring back.
dyed hair. familiar face.

i inhaled
pulled the cigarette from my lips
and breathed out.

you breathed in.

your eyes never left mine.

the raising tensions
the emotions behind things unsaid
the distance between us.

familiar.

we were older.
or so it seemed.

it felt
just like it did
a long time ago.

it felt like



misunderstanding.


truth.

do i want you because you're wonderful?



it's 430 AM, and Cinderella pops in my head.

i think i'm going into nostalgic / sappy mode.


so many thoughts in my head.

..
PS. Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami is probably the random-est, most poetic/descriptive/beautiful coming-of-age piece of prose that I've ever come across.

The 2nd book I've read by him.. and he's a brilliant author.
quotes/reflections to follow.

Step 1: Know what your heart desires.

Step 2: GO FOR IT.


--
Thank you, ABC, for this summer.

Things That Make Me Love Life Right Now:

1. The SUN. I’m that kind of person… the sun dictates my moods (most of the time). The sun is out, and I am happy. So right now, life is good. I’m content. For the first time this summer, I walked over to central park and ate lunch. Finally I get to cross that off my list. The breeze was perfect; the scenery, beautiful; the sea of people – 5 burly men walking 20 dogs, bikers, bike carriages, horses… it was a scene that makes you want to say “ahhhhhh.” Breathe in.
2. The CITY. Staying overnight in the city at the Millenium Plaza Hotel across the UN… seeing the views from the 37th floor of the city skyline… finding my way around the city on my own (even at 530AM this morning to get to work)… I’m beginning to love it more and more. There’s a vibrance that I never used to appreciate. When I was younger, I hated large places. Malls and airports scared me. The smell of NYC still does turn me off. But… I suppose because I’m older, I’m appreciating it more. Being 21 is a perk I have yet to utilize in the city though, since I’ve found no one to meet for happy hour here as of yet. But I don’t need that ‘stuff’ to make me feel like this, like breathing in the air and feeling the breeze IS just enough here.
3. The JOB. I have less than 2 weeks left here at ABC… and as much as I want to kick back and relax (the 6am shift has me sleep-deprived!), this is the kind of place I want to be. The environment: awesome. Fast-paced. Working, because I enjoy it. Great people. Supportive. I look around and see those who have been here, those who really ‘reek’ of LIKING what they do. I observe the exec’s… and their leadership shows. That’s how I want to be. I want to see all aspects of this industry. I want to know the in’s, the out’s, the good, the bad. One day, some day, I’ll be something great. Starting with today. Starting with this measly internship. Starting at 21.
4. The FRIENDS. I already praise them enough, even if they don’t realize it. Enough said in this department.
5. The BOY. Expect an even shorter, words-cannot-describe-how-I-feel response:
=].
6. The REALITY. It hits like a ton of … contentment. Goodbye, rain.
Hello, sunshine.
At least for today.